Find the Way
by Arete the Philhellene
Summary: Robbed of his freedom, tied down by his wounds...and the nightmare of death ahead of him, his eyes cry for his fate...yet in his words,his strength, and his will, he believes he will find the way. 2nd chap redone, HIATUS mild hints of asukira, and deayza
1. Chapter 1: Darkness

**Disclaimer: **I may write chapter after chapter. I may fantasizeabout every character. But Mobile Suit Gundam SEED, aka Kidi Senshi Gundam SEED, shall never be mine. Please note that all plotlines and characters of the series are owned by the director, Fukuda-sama. The ownership rights over the series to to Sunrise and Bandai entertainment. Fields of Hope is also not owned by me, but is property or Rie Tanaka-sama. But this plotline, and any new character, or poems I may write, belong to me, Haru Hotaru. 

**A/N: **This is the re-written version of my first chapter of Find the Way. Please read and review, have I improved it or made it worse?

Full Summery: 'Robbed of his freedom, tied down by his wounds, the nightmare of death ahead of him...his eyes cry for his fate, but in his words, his strength, and his will, he believes he will find the way' Kira has been captured by ZAFT and according to Rau Le Creuset, has to pay a death toll for betraying ZAFT. Can Athrun just stand by and let that happen? If he helps Kira he'll be branded a traitor and be a fugitive for the rest of his life. If he doesn't, he'll never see his best friend again. Heart over mind, or mind over heart?hints ofAsuKira, and DeaYza, and YzaxOcand a bit of DeaMiri.MwuxMurrue is gauranteed, but isn't a main focus.Also a little TollexMillie.Rated T for violence, Yzak's aggressive vocabulary, and hints (mild ones) of shounen-ai.

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Kira's POV **

The darkness surrounded me. It was so peaceful, a place free of war, of stuggles, of hatred, of tears. It was calming. It was dreamless. It was a sleep that was just-sleep, and nothing more. No tension, no pressure, no pain...it was a dream come true.

_Beneath a veil so cold, _

_You deeply sleep, all alone _

_The melody of prayer; on the lonely fields, _

_A little light Shined_

But the moment was sadly, not meant to last. You're lucky to get a minute of peace in a raging war. War is not kind enough. You can never forget about it. It'll kill your innocence, it'll give you pain. It will show you how to kill-it will teach you to kill or be killed.

_I watched as you dreamed _

_You laughed like a child _

_So dear, and yet so far -_

_That is the promise of our future_

Sure enough, the battle alarm echoed through the empty halls on the battleship Archangel of the 8th fleet.

"All hands to level one battle stations! All hands to level one battle stations! I repeat: all hands to level one battle stations!"

Then the darkness is gone. The peace of the moment never to be felt again. I'm up, struggling into my uniform, bolting through the chaotic hallways, into the hangers. Once again, I'm putting on my battle suit, and once again, I climb into the Strike's cockpit.

"Kira Yamato, Strike, preparing to launch…"

Once again, I'm about to launch.

"Approved, your targets are the Duel, the Blitz, and the Buster." Came Miriallia's voice.

Once again, it's the Le Crueset team.

"Kira Yamoto, Strike, let's do it!"

Once again, the Strike is thrown out of the battleship, into the awaiting nightmare.

_That one day, on a green morning, _

_One day, we will make it there _

_Because in this wintered sky _

_We still believe _

_Fields of Hope_

As soon as I was thrown out of the ship, I shot at the duel. SkyGrasper was amidst battle with the Buster.

Blitz was coming dangerously close to the ArchAngel. But as Miriallia had said, the crimson gundam was not there. My mind lingered on the matter for awhile, as the pilot was none other then my best friend Athrun Zala. Facing each other-trying to kill one another-but the friendship was still there, deep inside, hidden and forever locked away. I shook my head, as I had much more important issues at hand. I snapped out of my trance, and chased desperatly at the Blitz, who had gotten dangerously close to the Archangel while I had spaced out.

I managed to ward off the Blitz, the SkyGrasper had done the Buster some damage, which left the Duel which was speeding towards me. I got in position to strike back, but a sudden flow of dizziness flooded me as I suffered a blow straight to the cockpit. The cockpit shook vigerously, back and forth, side by side. I felt the glass of my helmet shatter.The Buster then attacked me by the side. By now, I could see the crimson stain of blood. After being assualted in the back by the Blitz, I felt the cockpit collapse ontop of me. My left arm was caught in the middle of the falling debris. I felt it snap, and was hit suddenly by excruciating pain. As the Duel attacked again,I was thrown into the front display screen, trying hard not to pass out.

"Kira!" I vaguely heard Miriallia say. Her voice was worried, and strangely quiet, yet panicked. "Kira! Kira, are you alright?"

I couldn't bring myself to respond, it was to painful to speak.

"Kira...?" came the voice, the voice I had been waiting to hear...even in war, even when that voice spoke to me with hatred and anger. Athrun was here. Whether he'd spare me or kill me, the thought brought comfort. The presence was close, that presence that I wanted to be near, and yet resented.

"What took you so long?" I heard the pilot of the Duel shout.

"The Aegis still had to under-go a few repairs, and they wouldn't let me out until it was finished..."

I opened my eyes. So that was why he hadn't been there. I smiled painfully. It hurt so much...

"Athrun...help me!" I managed to whisper, before once more, all I could see was darkness.

_On the day we were born, we were embraced _

_And now we search for those gentle hands again _

_T__he melody of a prayer; one vanishes, _

_And all begins again; a powerless, painful continuation_

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Athruns POV **

The Aegis had not been repaired when the attack was initiated. So I had waited patiently, all the more not to go out there again. All the more not to fight. All the more not to point a gun at my best friend.

When the mechanics had finished, I had reluctantly climbed into the cockpit, and took off to help my comrades, but to fight a friend.

_One day, to that green morning, _

_We'll cross through all these nights _

_Because that is the place each one of us searches for_

When I arrived, the Strike was in bad condition. It's legs were cut off, and it had been dealt a bad hit to the cockpit, the sides, and it's back. The cockpit seemed to have collapsed in on the pilot...the pilot!

"Kira…" I muttured.

"What took you so long?" Yzak demanded.

"The Aegis still had to under-go a few repairs, and they wouldn't let me out until it was finished..." I said, but I wasn't really paying much attention to the pilot of the Duel.

"Athrun...help me!" I could hear a faint voice, barely above a whisper come from the Strike. I panicked.

"Kira?" escaped from my throat, and my heart froze. I had been fighting against him...I had been pointing guns at him! But the sound of his voice..so weak, so hurt...

"Kira? Who's Kira? Is he the pilot of this damned thing?" asked Yzak menacingly. I knew he was smirking, and his eyes were glowering, I knew his vains were pumping with hatred for the one who had wronged him.

"I'll take your silence as a yes," continued Yzak. "But how you know his name...I don't know, but I will find out. You've not been yourself these past few weeks. It's all related, isn't it? In this case, I won't kill him yet. We'll capture him, and then I'll squeeze the truth out of both of you! And more over, I'll get to see his face, the face of the one who gave me this scar!"

"Yzak..." I was stunned. I had practically told Yzak that the one he hated most-couldn't stand the most-was my best friend. What was I to do? Leave him here, with those manipulative, cold hearted, treacherous naturals? I shivered...this was my chance. My chance to get Kira away from thier bloodstained hands! How I would explain things to my comrades...what lies I would tell, how I would hide the truth, I didn't know. I knew Yzak was up to something, but I was grateful. Without further hesitation, I grabbed ahold of Kira's mobile suit, and dashed towards the Versailles.

_Now, within my own heart, I want to keep you warm _

_So dear, and yet so far -_

_I__n the name of peace _

_Fields of Hope_

But I wasn't so confident in my choice, as I neared our battleship. My mind and heart battled each other aggressively, never reaching an agreement.

'You are going to regret this, Athrun. This will only bring tears to both of you.' came the voice from my mind, the voice of reason.

'I don't care…I want to be with Kira again..' said the other. The voice of my heart. The voice of love.

_So dear, and yet so far - _

_The fields of a promise _

_Fields of Hope _

_Fields of Hope_

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_

There you have it, the re-written version. I re-wrote it again, by the way, and changed quite a few things. Please tell me if it is better or worse. I'd also like to thank Anne Lamott, author of 'Bird by Bird', a very helpful guide for writers, that gave me courage to continue this, and to keep on writing, and that with a little editing, plot changing, grammer improving, and a little tweaking here and there, this fanfiction could become a good one.


	2. Chapter 2: Injured

**A/N: **This is the re-written version of Chapter two.

**Chapter Summery: **The members of the council are in an uproar. Commander Rau Le Crueset has come to a decision, which will break Athruns heart.

**Warning: **A little shounen-ai, barely noticable, though.

**Yzak's POV**

Athrun just captured the Strike pilot. Why? Is he out of his mind? I carry this scar on my face because of him! Doesn't he understand? He's the enemy! Well, I have always's wanted to see his face. I'll let him live. But not for long.

**Athrun's POV**

As we neared the Versailles, I started to get nervous. Was I really doing the right thing? How would ZAFT react? Shaking my head, I reasoned with myself. Leaving him behind would only give him more pain. I had made the right decision...right?

I carried the Strike into the hanger, softly placing it down. Many eyes turned our way, the mechanics baffled at the sight of a half-destroyed enemy mobile suit.

Quickly exiting the Aegis, I went to the strike entering the emergency release code.

The doors slid open, and revealed the site I had been dreading to see.

**Rau Le Creuset's POV**

So, Athrun captured the Strike? That wasn't unexpected, really. Even I know the value of friendship. But this "Kira" won't last long with the council. Traitors aren't treated well here at ZAFT. Even that is somewhat an understatement.

Sighing deeply, I contacted the PLANT.

Briefing them on the situation, the reaction was just as expected.

"Very well…I shall see what I can do…no, we cannot return to PLANT. We shall have himexecuted here. But not right away. It would hurt Athrun to much."

"Very well Commander," said Patrick Zala. "But he cannot last long…I'm afraid."

Nodding briefly, I shut down the communication. '_You'll just have to deal with it Athrun, we all have things we don't want done, that can't be helped._'

**Athrun's POV**

My eyes widened at the scene before me. Kira's helmet glass was shattered, his arm looked like it wasn't attached to his body, his leg was broken, as with his back. His expression held pain and sorrow clouded over in confusion.

Swiftly, I floated into the cockpit, gently touching his cheek. Blood had seeped through a head injury, and half his face was covered in crimson blood.

I slowly unbuckled the straps that held him. My hands were shaking. He gently opened his eyes and turned his head, wincing at the pain, in my direction.

"_Athrun..._" came the faint whisper.

"It's going to be alright, Kira. Everythings going to be okay, you hear! Everythings going to be alright, I'll take care of you, Kira.You're going to be okay!" My own voice was shaking though. I don't know how comforting it was. This is all my fault, I should have been there! I should have protected him! He was always so small, so weak...he always needed my protection. And he still needs it.

I squeezed his left arm free, and he squirmed in pain, and he started to sob quietly.

"Shh, Kira. It's going to be alright! Don't cry."

No longer trapped, he fell forwards, and into my arms. I wrapped my arms around him, holding him in a tight embrace.

I gently jumped to the ground, placing his injured body on the floor. Ignoring all the mutters and stares, I quickly took off his helmet. "_Athrun.." _I smiled sadly, and hugged him again, before picking him up and running towards the infirmary,

"Hey, Zala…wait!" cried Yzak, chasing after me followed by the rest of my comrades.

"Cut it out, Yzak!" I snapped at him, not caring to give a backwards glance. I hate him sometimes, I swear...

He and the others stopped short at my exclamation. I bit my lip hard, as Kira squeezed my neck tightly. "Shh, everything will be just fine, I'm here..."

When I arrived, the paramedics looked up in surprise. An uneasy silence hung in the atmosphere.

"He needs medical attention, he needs it **now**! Understand?" I nearly yelled at them, while lowering Kira to a bed.

I glanced over at them, and glared at them commandingly. They quickly obeyed without question. I smiled sadly, squeezing Kira's hand tightly.

**1 hour later**

Iglanced around the room. About every person of importance was there…around Kira's bed.

Commander Le Crueset cleared his throat.

"The council has announced that Mr.Yamato be executed. However…" Rau Le Crueset glanced atmy shocked face. "He has been given a little time since then. He will be executed on Friday, October.13. That is all for now."

This chouldn't be happening. It just chouldn't. A single tear escaped my eye. Wiping it away, I stood up, and slowly walked away, my head hanging.

They couldn't do this. I had to stop them. But…if I stopped them, I whould be a…traitor…

The voice in my head kept nagging me, in anger. The one inside my heart was shocked and in tears.

I walked into my room and flopped down on my bed. Slowly crying into my pillow.

Something about this just wasn't right...Kira wasn't apart of ZAFT, so how could he betray it? And what about a trial...there had been no mention of a trial! I felt myself shake in anger, overpowered by hatered for the world. I dug my head deeper into the pillow, hugging myself in fear. I sobbed once more, trying to overcome my hysteria.

"Kira...I will make things right...I will!"

TBC 

**A/N:Arigato, minna-san! Arigato! That was the re-written version of chapter 2. As you can see, it's the same plotline with more details, and hopefully, better grammer. Hopefully, I'll be done editing by september, then in October I'll finally update. My set deadline for this story is the first day of spring next year. So, I'll try to be done by January of Febuary. Setting a deadline makes me hurry up the process of writing. Also, this story is being written FOR YOU! Not myself. If your a loyal, constant reader of mine, I'll do my utmost to please you. If your a flamer, I'll pay no heed. Unless theres something critical you point out in the format of a flamer, then I will HAVE to do as you say, but otherwise, your wasting time. But go ahead. Also, if theres anything wrong with my fanfic even with the editing, please inform me, but don't expect quick fixes. You see, my first priority is to edit, then to make progress. So when I'm done editing, any other editing will wait until completion. If it's not urgent, that is. Major errors will be fixed as soon as possible. But further edits to this and the previous chapter are limited.**

**I'll leave the review response secton, since the reviews were so precious to me.**

**Kiralover2: **Aww thanks! I feel happy that you liked my fic!

**Ilover-athrun: **Is it just me, or do you always say that? I know my grammer wasn't good but I'm trying to fix that. Thanks for your review nonetheless.

**RuByMoOn17: **Thanks! I'll remember that. Lol

**Shad0w118: **Thanks for your review. I'll do a spell check this time!

**Sakura-Moonlight: **umm thanks? I don't know what "oh" means particularly.

**XXXStrike-FreedomXXX: **You really think it's great? Thank you!

**Darketelka: **Thank you! I am continuing it, mostly on your plead. I'm glad you liked it, and hopefully my spelling and grammar will be better this time!


	3. Chapter 3: Nightmares

Find The Way By: Serenity 

**Chapter Summery: **Life on the Vasailius and Archangel are not going so well.

**A/N: **Last chapter, when I said yaoi, it was a warning. This story dausn't contain sexual interaction between Athrun or Kira, nor Yzack and Dearka. What you will see is brotherly love. But some people chould flame me for yaoi, which I really don't want to happen. But there are several times of comforting with hugs, forehead kissing, etc. I am not experianced enough to write yoai fics, nor do I have the courage…yet. So I will continue the warnings, although it will not be intended to have guy to guy love.

**Warning:** Has interatcions that some chould catagorize as "yaoi". If brotherly hugs, forehead kisses, or any type of comforting Athrun or Kira, ot read!

Chapter Two: Nightmares Kira's POV 

Darkness. Darkness surrounded me. All was black. I blinked up and down. No light whould shine through no matter how I whould love it if some did. Slowly a figure appeared before me. Azure haired, with brilliant emerald eyes, dressed in a red uniform of some sort and gray pants.

"Athrun…" I said. The figure of my childhood friend gained distance. I started running towards it.

"Athrun…come back…don't leave me!"

The distance widened.

"Athrun!" I yelled though my voice was strangely weak.

The figure disappeared.

"ATHRUN!" I screamed at the very top of my voice.

**Athrun's POV**

I woke up to a loud scream. Bolting upward, I stretched and strained my ears.

Then I heard a scream much louder-yelling out my name. Kira The voice sure sounded like Kira's.

Throwing on my clothes, I sprinted down the hall towards the infirmary.

Kira was covered in sweat, and was shaking repeatedly. The IV's connected to his arms and chest strained.

"Athrun…" mumbled Kira.

"Kira…" I said softly. "Is he having nightmares…about me?" Gently taking Kira's hand in my own, I sat down beside him.

**On the Archangel**

"Theres no trace of him…anywhere?" asked Murrue Ramuis. The man shook his head. His bond hair flayling. He opened his eyes to reveal heavenly blue eyes that held a sad tint. Mwu La Fllaga looked up at his love. Mouse brown hair past her shoulders, deep amber eyes, she was truly beautiful. She nodded slwoly, a few tearsfalling. "He…was like a son..to me."

Mwu nodded briefly. "He was like my little brother.." he softly said.

"Ensin Argyle.." she called out. "Yes captain?" asked Sai turning around. "Please inform your friends that Kira is indeed MIA…"

Sai froze. Then he walked out of the cockpit of the Archangel somewhat fiercly, his breathing gone ragged.

"So…it's true. Kira's gone..." said Tolle softly fighting back his own tears.

Miriallia slowly cried into Tolle's shoulder, sobbing.

Kuzzey looked at the ground. Sai shook uncontrollably.

"Whats wrong with you?" came the voice of Fllay Alster. Bright red hair, soft blue eys that chould easily turn hard. "He deserved it. Like every other coordinater. Stop your childhood weeping, we created coordinaters to serve us…even die for us. When they didn't serve us…we were forced to kill them. Kira Yamato was the only one who agreed to serve us. Didn't he? He died for us…because he allowed himshelf to become a slave."

Everyone's eyes widened.

"That's-that's not true," said Miriallia. "Kira was a friend. The last thing we wanted was to have him killed. But was it our choice? With the ships condition…we'd have all been destroyed. Buy yet you..Kira loved you. With all his heart. But you used him! Now you send him bad omens by cursing him? He dausn't deserve that Fllay…nobody dause…but espeacially not Kira."

Fllay covered her face with her hands and ran to her headquarters.

Gently sobbing into her hands. She did really love Kira. But she put on a mask. Convinced everyone that she hated him…along with every other coordinater. But Miriallia's words were…to much. Everyone probably hated her now…even Sai. She didn't need his love. That was just an arranged infatuation. But with Kira…it was her choice. True love. 'I hope he's alive' she thought soberly. 'I also hope that he'll find someone to look after him. I don't desere him. After Father's death…I can't take of this mask. All I can hope for…is that he'll somehow learn of my true feelings.'

**Back On The Vasialius**

Athrun Zala approached Commander Rau Le Crueset's office.

"Commander?" he asked.

"Yes Athrun," asked the masked blonde.

Athrun drew in a sharp breath. Confronting Rau Le Crueset whouldn't be easy.

"Sir, with all due respect," he started. "Why is Kira Yamato going to be executed? He was never apart of ZAFT, so how is he a traitor? Dausn't he deserve a trial? Dausn't everyone? He is in critical condition! We don't even know if he's going to make it! What's the point of training him if we're going to kill him?"

Rau Le Crueset sat down on his desk, unabashed at Athrun's words. He had expected this.

"A coordinater..that sides on the Earth Alliances side can bring many of our fellow coordinaters to think along him or her's lines. If such a thing happens, then the war will have a better chance at a quick end. Which is the good part. If they start to rebel, the council will be bombarded with complaints. The Archangel treated Mr.Yamato well. If that reached the PLANT's in any way…we whould begin to have probloms. With this to add load on our shoulders, the EA chould sieze their chance and strike. If that happens…our chance of winning this war will become low. So we chould lock him up for the rest of his life…which whould be cruel…too cruel…we are treating him to make you happy…Athrun."

**TBC**

Srry short again but it's 12:00 am! Review. I know you wanna!


	4. The author thanks her reviewers

Hello everybody! This is an A/n to thank all my reviewers! I will also update my story this weekend. Also last chap, I didn't spellcheck. Please forgive me! It was seriously 12:00 in the morning…and I was falling asleep. In those situations, things tend to slip your mind.

Chapter Two Reviewers:

XXXStrike-freedomXXX: Thank you! It is pretty sad. Lol 

**Riley Mayori: **Thanks for your review! I did update and I plan on doing it soon again.

**Iloveathrun: **Thank you! I will continue!

**AnimeFanFromAnAnimeDeprivedTown**: You have a very good point. Hopefully, everything will be explained in chapter 3.

**ZGMF X-19A Infinite Justice: **Thanks for the review! Yes, you do have to wait! Well, thanks again, I really appreciated your review.

**Anonymouse Character: **This isn't a true yoai fic as I explained. But if you hate yoai, why take the time to read or look through any yaoi fic? If your going to say "yaoi sucks" in your review, then why review? Review's are to help the writer improve their writing or praise their story, etc. Reviews are not meant to write something like that which is a total waste of a review space. I have 20 reviews, not 21…I'm leaving yours out. Next time, go away, or review on something REAL in my story. Did you even read it? Thank you for getting my temper up!

**Sakura-Moonlight: **Thanks? I don't know what "whoa!" means either…but thanks for your review anyway

**Silver Ferret: **Thanks for your reviews! Your wish has been granted! There will be more! Yzak…Yzak…Yzak…memorising spelling It's okay, when it comes to certain things, I can be a negger too. I didn't mind at all

**Chapter three reviewers:**

**r**- Thanks! You'll get more!

**Shad0w118: **Thanks for your review! Yes, I know…I explained that I forgot to spell check..STUPID SLEEP! Grr! Well…I was really sleepy..lol

**ZGMF X-19A Infinite Justice: **Thank you for your review! Yup, you'll have to wait and see…no spoilers coming from moi, lol

**XXXStrike-FreedomXXX: **Thank you! I will update later this weekend I promise!

**Silver Ferret: **Sorry about that! Lol it's okay..like the amount of times I say "lol" really annoys people…lol. I've memorized the spelling now. Thank you! I'll update later this weekend!

**AnimeFanFromAnAnimeDeprivedTown: ** Thanks for your review! Acthually, I liked it. It told me that I had to work hard on my story. I didn't create a complex storyline or anything…so I have yet to do a lot of planning. I am fairly new at writing, so your review helped a lot. Rau-like? Well, yeah, Rau is insane. Glad my explanation met your standards! I'll update soon!

Well, that's all for now! I'll update when givin the chance. Oh, and just because I've thanked reviewers, dausn't mean that you can hold your rview, I'll thank you later!

Review…I know you wanna! lol


	5. chapter 4: Reflections

Find The Way

By: Haru Hotaru 

**A/N: **I changed my name to Haru Hotaru. It means Spring Firefly in Japanese.

I'm re-doing the summery of my story a bit. Not the one you see under the title. The one you find inside, which tells you the couples.

**Summery: ** Kira has been captured by ZAFT and according to Rau Le Creuset, has to pay a death toll for betraying ZAFT. Can Athran just stand by and let that happen? If he helps Kira he'll be branded a traitor and be a fugitive for the rest of his life. Mostly KA but a bit of DY, DM,YOC, MM, and TM as well! Lacus and Cagalli make thier appearance, but Kira/Lacus and Athrun/Cagalli will not be spoken off. KF will be hinted, but not carried out. Do not read if you are uncomforted by comforting between boys. No sexual boy tension nor sexual thoughts. Brotherly love! OC character will be added! Rated T for violence, language.

Chapter Songs: Untitled by Simple Plan, Boulevard of broken dreams by Greenday, Song of peace by Lacus Clyne, In This Quite Night by Lacus Clyne, and Majestic by Haru Hotaru, If It Only, by Haru Hotaru.

**Chapter Summery: **Tensions mount between the ZAFT soldiers. Lacus Clyne enters the story, and appearance by Haru Hotaru and her father, Jonathan Marla Hotaru.

**Kira's POV-Reflecting on the past.**

_I walk a lonely road,_

_The only one I have ever known,_

_Don't know where it gause_

_But it's only me and I walk alone._

_I walk this empty street_

_On the boulevard of broken dreams._

I was a coordinator fighting for the EA. I had friends…friends I had to protect. But was anybody there to guide me? Yes, for a while. Lacus Clyne with her flowing pink hair and heavenly blue eyes. For her limited stay, she was there to catch my fall. I enjoyed her presence. She helped-a lot.

In return for her kindness, I set her free. Set her free to _Athrun_. He told me to come along. But I refused. Bound by a sense of protectiveness and a promise I had for my natural friends.

There are decisions you have to make in life, but they can bring endless pain. It makes you wonder, is the right choice really worth the pain?

When your surrounded by people, but you feel as if you're walking alone, nobody to hold your hand, nobody to guide you?

_When the city sleeps_

_And I walk alone_

_I walk alone_

_My shadow is the only one that walks beside me._

Living each day, playing along. Putting on fake smiles, finding love in someone who's just using you. Yes, I know for fact that Fllay is using me. But it feels good to be in someone like Fllay's arms. Maybe, I love her. Maybe I am using her as she is using me. Either way, I feel like I have to protect her from harm.

So I fight over her. I make her mine. I hurt for her, and perhaps, deep down she feels the same way.

Miriallia Haww, a shy girl, is like a sister to me. I remember giving her advice to ask Tolle out. It worked out, and I'm glad.

Kuzzey has always been distant towards me, but is still a friend.

Sai is a great friend. I can always count on him to help me, and is a great advice giver. I'm happy to have made friends with him.

Tolle has always been there for me through thick and thin. He has never left my side in times of despair, and has become like a brother. Even in what he was by my side, in spirit if not able to be there physically. He stood up for me, and became my closest friend on the Archangel.

But not even Tolle should replace Athrun. Nobody could.

However, I got by.

Maybe it was the fact that I was on the Archangel. I must admit, I loved being on the Archangel.

Having a soft, kindhearted yet competitive captain, who often fought with strick and stern Officer Badgeroul. A commander who loved to make jokes, like the big brother I never had.

Moreover, the fact that whenever we went to an allied base such as Artimis, the soldiers were all coldhearted. But on the Archangel, there was warmth and kindness coming my way. Add the fact that love was there. Even amidst war. I liked it there.

But there was a hole. That chould never be filled. But maybe it whould fill. In a ZAFT ship that wanted to kill me. Maybe it chould be filled here. Drifting between consciousness and unconsionciouseness, here on an infirmary bed on the Vasailius.

**Athrun's POV**

This chouldn't be happining. No…it just chouldn't. They were so cold hearted! They only treated Kira to make him feel content, and were prepared to kill him for a reason like that? I shouldn't have captured him…I should have brought him back to the Archangel! I whould have gone into there cells! Or I chould have even joined the EA!

I can see why Kira joined them! However, I will fight as hard as I can, for Kira.

I sat on a small chair beside Kira's bed. Slowly, his eyes fluttered open.

_I opened my eyes_

_I tried to see but I'm blinded_

_By the white light_

_I can't remember how,_

_I can't remember why,_

_I'm lying here tonight._

"Hey," I greeted.

"Athrun?" I asked. "Is it really you?"

"Yes," I said softly. "You're here, with me."

"What's going on?" he asked uncertainly.

"We captured you," I said, my voice cracking. "But it was the wrong thing to do…their going to execute you on October.13th." It came out painfully. I just choked it out.

_And I can't stand the pain_

_And I can't make it go away,_

_No, I can't stand the pain!_

"Executed?" Kira's eyes widened, but softened again. "That gives me quite some time, Athrun. It's May.20th! It gives me a lot of time! Maybe I can recover in that time…and I get to be with you, Athrun! I'm sure things will work out, don't worry."

He was being brave. For my sake.

I knew that on the inside, he was shocked.

_How chould this happen to me_

_I've made my mistakes_

_Got nowhere to run_

_The night gause on_

_As I'm fading away_

_I'm sick of this life!_

_I just want to scream!_

_How chould this happen to me?_

Softly kissing his forehead, I whispered in his ear. "Go back to sleep now. I know you're in pain. Go to sleep. I'll wait for you."

_In this quite night,_

_I'm waiting for you,_

_Forgetting the part,_

_And dreaming of you._

All this pains me. I'll slip of the edge soon.

_I'm slipping of the edge_

_I'm hanging by a thread_

_I want to start this over again_

_So I try to to hold onto a time_

_When nothing mattered_

_I can't explain what happened_

_And I can't erase what I have done…_

…_no I can't…_

But I'll have to hang on. For Kira.

**Lacus' POV**

This morning, I got a message. A very important message. Atleast, to me. Kira has been captured. He will be executed, in a few month's.

Why? Because of military needs. If we take away someone's life because we want to be strong, how strong are we? Is it not weak to kill someone for that reason? Is it not desperate? The public have not been notified. Even if it whould be a load for the council to have him live, but what douse that make of us? The council said that we are kinder then the naturals. But if we want to look good so badly to throw a life away, we're much worse. Will peace present itself in such a land? For both sides, we have our wrongs. But we **both** drag on this war, when it chould be ended so easily. If both sides refuse to let the to other side exist..if we treat a person for **what **he is…not **who **he is…then we are all to be blamed. For the simple reason, natural or coordinator, we are all human beings! We are not separated! The coordinators aren't a different species! When the naturals attacked Junuis seven, they attacked themselves. Whenever ZAFT attacks the naturals, they attack themselves. That's the truth. We both need to acknowledge that, to bring peace.

_So still the evening air,_

_So warm and soft,_

_Peace everywhere_

_I see a world in harmony_

_I world of peace, and humanity_

_A world where people walk free_

_Like water in a stream_

_Flowing on, forever more._

So I'm heading to the council right now. To protest. They may all hate me. But it will be for a good deed, after all!

_In the midst of a barren land_

_They're a rose_

_Fighting for its life_

_It's hanging on_

_It's fighting_

_But how much longer _

_Can it hold on?_

_When the famine is spread_

_When all else wants it dead?_

_But it's fighting _

_It's hanging on to life_

_It's majestic._

_A single rose in a barren land._

There has always's been a barrier between the naturals and coordinators. But on the Archangel, that barrier is no more.

Kira proved to all of us that there is still hope. Though many refuse to grasp that. Kira was treated well. He had some real friends. The council wants to cover that. They cover it up…but I will reveal it…to the whole universe.

**Normal POV**

In ORB, a nation of neutrality, a building stood. It was there to serve ORB on its secret missions that sometimes took place. Such as the one about to start today.

Haru Hotaru walked to her father's desk.

"I am ready," she said. "I am ready to go to the Vasalius undercover to try to prevent Kira Yamato's execution."

**TBC**

**A/N: **I know this is confusing and unclear, but it'll make sense soon! I'll update again ASAP!

Review…I know you wanna!

As long as forever, I'll be by your side. I'll be your friend, your companion, you guide.


	6. Chapter 6: Missions and emotions

Find The Way By Haru Hotaru 

**Disclaimer: **I may write chapter after chapter. I may dream every night about it, I may fanatsize about every character…yet Gundam SEED will never be mine. Note that Gundam Seed belongs to Bandai sunrise, and is directed by Mr.Fukuda. If I owned GS, you whould be watching this on TV…not readin this.

**A/N: **Sorry everyone! I lost track of time…but heres the next chapter! This is my first story to get this many reviews or hits. So this is a little new to me, having people review and want updates. I am working on a total of 20 fics…not all on or not posted yet. So please bear with me. This is one of 5 that I have in priority. But I want back-up…I'm loaded by my eagerness to write. So again, forgive me if I'm slow. And for any mistakes. You should be happy to hear that I gave this fic top priority. However, there are other fics that I have writen and posted to

So please read my other fics:

For Gundam SEED:

Angelic: Vellicity Yamato is the oldest daughter of the late Kira Yamato. Yes, late. What happens when things go over board on the Archangel and Villicity is forced to walk her fathers footsteps and save the world from facing war again? Alternative to destiny.

For InuYasha:

My Angel: Kagome is getting married to…INUYASHA! But their wedding turns out to be more then a fairy tale…AU! IK and hinted SM as well.

For Yu-gi-oh:

New Found Hope: When a factory explodes, a new disease is formed. Scientists order everyone to stay inside as a second outside is futile. What happens when Serenity falls ill with this desease? Can Joey, Yugi, Tea, Tristen, Duke, Mai,and believe it or not Kaiba find the cure without falling ill themselves? SK, YT, JM

Future projects:

Unending Dream-Kagome finds out that she has cancer. What will happen? How will InuYasha take it? Written to inspire people to donate money for cancer. A lot of loved ones die that way. It's not fun having a family member or friend get infected with it. So lend a hand. IK

Remembering-Kagome is on her rare visets home…InuYasha followed her…he learns what goes on in the world, and finds out about a climatic war that ended on the 11th day and the 11th day. Written in memory for rememberance day. ONESHOT but may have a few more chapters. IK, RS, RK, AK, MS

Oh! One more thing to a good cause )

Kira: We're all really freaked out about all this bad wheater and natural calamity's going on.

Athrun: In real life, theres only one world no PLANT.

Cagalli: So please donate money to the victoms of Katerina and the earthquake in Pakistan

Lacus: Or all the poor people when suffer…if their not already dead. We must help out so that everyone can bring their lives back together…

Kira: Also…rememberence is coming soon so please remember!

Cagalli: If you felt bad in the war against the coordinaters and naturals, think about a real war…with real people being lost and sacrificing themselves. The idea is different…but the outcome the same. Mr.Zala…Azreal and Hitler…explsions…so take the time.

Lacus: Or all the people that died will not be able to rest in peace…

Athrun: _In Flander fields the poppies grow_

_Between the crosses row by row_

_That mark our place_

_And in the sky_

_The larks still bravely singing fly_

_Scarcely heard amid the…guns below_

Kira: _We are the dead_

_Short days ago,_

_We lived_

_Felt dawn_

_Saw sunset glow_

_Loved, and were loved_

_And now we lie in…flanders fields_

_Everyone: Take up our qaurral with the foe,_

_To you with failing hands we throw the torch,_

_Be your to hold it high_

If you fail we shall not sleep 

_Though poppies grow in flanders fields_

_Between the crosses row by row._

Now the chapter starts…finally… Summer has come and passed The innocent can never last Wake me up when september ends Haru's POV 

My name is Haru Hotaru. I am loyal to ORB and am a coordinater. My mother however, was a natural. She was killed..by the duel the same day the Archangel went down to earth…and we said goodbye to General Hallberton. The pilot of the duel…Yzak Joule…I whould be meeting him now. I'm not going to go crazy and accuse him. He didn't know who it was in the shuttle, it wasn't his fault. But what type of person is he? Does he hate Naturals? I hope not…but I don't expect a soldier to be gentle to the enemy.

I have been sent on the biggest mission in my life. But I can handle it. I've heard a lot about Kira Yamato. He's kind…cry's easily, yet finds a way to smile. I like him. Strong yet weak…determined and brave…yet so afraid.

You may ask how ORB knows all about this..but ORB has it's peacekeeping missions. Unknown to the vessals of the EA and ZAFT, we have atleast one spy onboard. Usually a low class officer. So we get notified of everything going on. Usually the officer will also be devoted to the military, so we cannot ask him/her to do any more. So if the need comes by, we send a spy to help out. That's my role. I hope I chould suceed. But I need help…but I can't. I can't trust anybody aboard as I've been told repeatedly.

I climb onto the Versailles, and am met by no other then Yzak Joule.

"Their still may be hope for Kira's survival?" asked Murrue in surprise.

Kuzzey nodded slowly. "But it's very slim…"

"Tell us," urged the famouse Hawk of Endymyion.

"I heard him and Lacus Clyne talking," said Kuzzey.

"Eavsdropping more like it," Mwu said innocently.

"He said that the pilot of the Aegis was a close friend…and Lacus seemed to like him, make friends with him."

"Childhood friends don't abandon them…and I'm sure Lacus will be upset should he be executed…" said Tolle reasonably.

Kuzzey nodded.

"The pilot of the Aegis is an elite soldier…and Lacus Clyne is the hottest singer in the PLANT's and an important political figure. It's only two but…maybe they chould change things and Kira chould live."

Murrue smiled sadly. "For once I'm glad you were eavsdropping, Kuzzey. We might just have our Kira back."

The shuttle landed smoothly and Lacus undid her seatbelt. She was preparing to give a huge speech…and she was nervouse. What if she failed…no…that chouldn't happen. She was going to save Kira's life.

Kira's eyes fluttered open.

"Athrun…what are you still doing here?" he said uncertainly.

The blunetter nods and smiles.

"I'm worried about you," he says softly. "Your still in pain."

It was true, Kira was in pain and his smile was weak.

"I'm fine Athrun," he says. "But you shouldn't stay here all the time."

"I like being here with you," Athrun says softly. "It makes me feel happy."

Kira smiled weakly.

"I'm happy with you too."

"Athrun?" Kira suddenly asks.

"Hai?" comes the reply.

"What about the Archangel? Is it okay?"

"The Archangel is just fine. We haven't attacked it…yet…and hopefully won't." Athrun stated calmly.

"You can't!" cried Kira. "I don't want them to die…their my friends…"

"Kira," said Athrun. "I know you were bound to make some new friends…but if their your friends then, who am I?" It had hurt to see Kira call a bunch of naturals his "friends"…like he was nothing.

"Athrun, it's not like that," stutted Kira, taken aback. "You a friend, one of the best. I've missed you so much…but they cannot defend themselves. I've come to know everyone on that ship so well…if they die, I don't know what I'll do!"

Kira tried to sit up, but struggled because of the sharp pain. "You…can't…attack…them…they'll all die!" His voice was suddenly harsh.

"Kira!" Athrun took hold of his childhood friend and tried to puch him back down. Though the brunette still struggled. "What….what if another team attacks…there will only by Lt. Le Fllaga there to protect them! He's not that good….and if they die…it'll be all my fault…if their destroyed, then I deerve to die as well!"

"…Kira…" Athrun embraced the crying boy in his arms and let him sob on his shoulders.

"Kira it's okay. Nobody preciouse to you will die. You won't die either…because you are preciouse to me. Nobody will die…not you…not anyone…I'll make sure of that."

**TBC**

Now time to thank my kind reviewers!

**r**-You'll get more!

ZGMF X-19A Infinite Justice: um no offence but can I call you Infinite Justace? It takes really long to write you name ;; Well, your answeres will be answered ASAP!

**Sakura-Moonlight-** It'll remain confusing for some time. Thanks for your review!

**Kioke-princess-if-pain: **Your egtting more! Thanks for your review!

**Silver Ferret:** Yzak is cool! And…hot…lol. Lacus doesn't have any time to be an airhead in my fic anyway! Lol. I hope you like my story and the chapters to come.

**Darketelka:** It's okay you can read them a year from now even. I'm glad you like my story, and theres more on the way!


	7. Chapter 6: A Step Out Of The Unseen

Find The Way 

**A/N: **I am so sorry everyone! I didn't get the time to update! Oh, well, I'm updating now and let's hope I haven't lost my reviewers!

**Disclaimer:** I may write chapter after Chapter. I may fantasize about every character. But Mobile Suit Gundam SEED shall never be mine. Please note that Kidi Senshi Gundam SEED is owned by Bandai and Sunrise, and is directed by Fukuda-sama.

**Chapter Summery:** One word is all it takes: Failure

**Chapter Songs:** Darkness' Tranquility be me Poems: Step out of the unseen be me

**Chapter 6: **A Step Out Of The Unseen

Haru floated towards Yzak, just like she normally would to anyone.

_Can this sky get any darker?_

_Can this wind blow even a little harder?_

_Can this rain that falls so serenely create a disaster?_

_Step out of the unseen._

Taking in his features, she gasped noticeably. His silver hair complemented his blue eyes, and he looked stunning in his uniform.

I can only repeat these words of love I tell you- Or are they words of hate? 

_When you smile at me,_

_Can you feel my sudden joy too?_

_Just like a beam of light in a dark room._

"Are you just going to stand there?" Yzak stated impatiently. "I have been ordered to assist you to the Versailles, and show you around. So can you stop staring at me?"

"Oh, sorry," Haru said collecting herself. "I'm just nervous. Don't mind me, go ahead and do your job, Yzak-san,"

When I look at your eyes I will apologise 

_When you turn your back I will yell_

_When you break my heart,_

_I'll cry_

"Humph," Yzak dragged Haru to their destination. "Hey, watch it," Haru snatched her arm away. "Is this how you treat your fellow crewmen?"

"Feh, whatever, I was told to give you a tour. So I'm giving you one! Is that how you treat your superiors?"

My fights are never won 

_My treasures never lost_

_I'll be following you until eternity._

"So this is the type of man you turned out to be, Yzak Joule! This is war; you don't know if the people around you will die tomorrow or not!"

"You obviously don't know how to be a soldier. Learn how too. We can't put up with inconsiderate fools like you!"

Yes, you may call me lonely 

_But only as lonely as you_

_When you close this heavy door_

_My heart cries out-cries to you_

"As you wish, Yzak-kun." Haru bit back the tears and forced a smile. Nothing can and will divert her attention from the mission. Not even Yzak.

Is this love? 

_Or maybe hate?_

_Can peace be?_

_When our words are our guns_

_Our hands swords_

_When will I next see your smile?_

_When will you look my way?_

_A step out of the unseen._

Rau Le Creuset's POV 

The door slid open, revealing the new recruit and a very pissed off Yzak. Typical.

"Haru Hotaru-san, is it?" I say wearily glancing up at them.

Haru gulps, nodding. Also typical. It's very typical for people to have a "freaked out" reaction to me. A masked man isn't exactly normal.

I smile at her softly and she looks a bit more confidant. Excellent. Nobody will figure out my secret if I act nice, open and very approachable.

"Has Yzak given you any trouble?" I ask.

"No, Commander, not at all," she smiles up at me.

So he did. Heh, people are the same. You can see through their lies easily, if you have been lied to as many times as I have.

"Good. Very good. Yzak, go to your quarters and don't come out until you've thought about what you've done!" I love being weird.

"Hai!" Yzak turns and walks out of the room really fast. He won't obey my orders. He'll go to the cafeteria and complain to Dearka for the next 3 hours.

I smile at Haru and she shifts uncomfortably. I start to fill her in on the rules and all those random things. I hate giving lectures. But I have to. It's my job. Maybe I should have thought about becoming a mobile suit pilot instead….nah! Pilots don't secretly plan to destroy all life in the universe.

(**A/N:** I am sorry for making Rau OOC, but I wanted to put a little wierdness in my story….I wanted to seek out a not-so-serious-part of Rau Le Creauset. He'll be back to normal soon…hopefully.)

Athrun's POV 

I gently lift my tired body to look up at the brunette sleeping on the bed. I bite down my lip, remembering the condition he is in. Seeing him all wired up like this….it isn't pleasant. Forcing back the sudden tears welling up in my eyes, I try to smile. "It's ok" I tell myself. "Come on Athun…don't be a crybaby like Kira!"

Shaking myself, I get up and walk to the café. Just for 5 minutes. I can't leave him alone for longer.

Normal POV 

"Calm down Yzak!" said Dearka tiredly. "You can complain about how immature the commander is some other time!"

"But he told me to go to my quarters and not come out until I had thought about what I had done! That's not proper soldier treatment! I should really report this, he'll be so busted!"

Yzak closed his eyes in anticipation for a split second, but by the time he opened them, Dearka had hurried away to talk to Athrun who had just entered.

Yzak looked away. Not his problom, Dearka was an idiot. Why should he care….but for Dearka…was he really so irritable for his best friend to run away like that? Life just wasn't fair.

Lacus' POV 

I walked into the room with my usual smile. I have to do this…if I don't…I'll never be able to pay Kira back…

"Hello everyone!" I brightly say, hiding away my worry and being the usual me man see.

"I want to discuss something of great importance to you! If you will please listen to what I have to say, then all will be well!"

"Yes, Miss.Clyne, you may continue," says Mr.Zala nodding briefly.

I smile brightly at everyone again, before starting.

"Today, in the morning, my fiance, Athrun, called and said that Mr.Yamato was to be executed. Why? He was never apart of ZAFT, so why should he be put through such pain? He wasn't even enlisted in the EA. Should we be so cold to do this to anyone? It was once Kira-san who helped me, and got me back, so is it not fair to let him be?"

A disturbing silence filled the room.

"Serena Satie wasn't executed, and she committed worse sins, yet she was able to collect herself while in prison, and become a better person! She helped a lot much after, and was quite friendly!" I say, naming the past criminal, who changed drastically in 20 years.

The room showed signs of melting.

"Kira-san might be able to help us end this war!" I said with a smile. Big mistake.

"Are you suggesting we use him to our own needs? We've thought about that, and it might be the alternative! I mean, taking advantage of him would be the best thing to do…..but with his ties to the legged ship, execution just seems better…" said Ezaria.

'uh oh no your dead, Lacus!' I thought. Sighing I admitted defeat, I really needed to think this over more….

"I didn't exactly mean it like that, but, it's almost time for my concert and I have to go!"

"Ok, Lacus-sama, you may leave."

I bowed respectfully before turning to leave.

**Cagalli POV-somewhere in space**

Damn it! Damn damn damn! I hate my life! Ok…I am going to calm down now. You are probably so mad. Well, you know the part where the brown haired boy with lavender eyes shoved me into the shelter? The one with the adorable bird? Well, it's all his fault! If he hadn't shoved me into the shelter, I wouldn't have gone back to orb, got mad at father even more, then took off to nowhere! For awhile I joined a rebel team, but I couldn't stay because well…they found out, so I had to go. They still liked me and everything, but they don't want to put the "princess of orb" in danger. Ok, if he didn't shove me, I would be dead. But now, I ran off again, I ran away to outer space. In search of that boy who saved my life. Yes, I know it's stupid, searching for a boy I don't even know, but hell, I'm worried about him. So here I am piloting my own shuttle, a civilian shuttle, to apparently, nowhere. I know. I'm crazy. I should have gone back to ORB. I could send people out to search for him, instead of just flying around with no idea as to where he is. But this is war, people. Sometimes, you've got to take a step out of reality, and do something completely absurd. You can diss me, you can hate me, but you'll never get to my soul, the thing that many so fondly target. Join me in my journey. It's only about to get crazier!

**TBC**

**A/N: **I know. Horrible. But I am finished the last chapter of this story, so, I only need to plot for the coming chapters, and then re-write the first chapter (I really need too) and then it's done! Although easier said then done, because I do have a life other then fanfiction writing, and I have over 30 stories, so as you can see, I am tied down. :D But who says that I can't put effort in my only good GS story so far?

**Rau Le Crueset: **You'd better not laugh at me for Haru making me OOC! Geez! I'm a commander, not a lunatic…oh wait, I am, sorry, I mean I'm not a….ok, what am I not that's bad? Uhh well, all I wanted to say is, try to review, if you have the spare time, and flames are now welcome as they will be used to burn down Haru's school! But keep them down to a minimum, we don't want the fire to spread!


	8. Chapter 8: Bloody Teachings

XXX—Find the Way-By Haru Hotaru-XXX 

**Disclaimer: **I may read chapter after chapter, I may fantasize about every character, but Mobile Suit Gundam SEED shall never be mine. Please note that Gundam SEED belongs to Bandai and Sunrise, and is directed by only Fukuda-sama.

**A/N: **Well, here is chapter 8! Took my forever to write! Anyway, I hope you enjoy it very much. I'm not feeling good, so please blame this horrible chapter on my horrible cold. Also, I said I wouldn't update until October, but when people tell me to update, I do. But the editing has only started. I have to re-edit chapter 2, I made a lot of mistakes there, a lot of typos, too. Like Yzak's POV should have been deleted, because of Yzak's new behavior in the first chapter. I'll work on it as soon as this is updated, kay?

Another thing, R.I.P to all the victims of September 11th, you will always be remembered in our hearts. And to the victims of the recent shootings in Montreal, R.I.P also, and let us hope that nothing like this college shooting will ever take place again.

Now, onto the story! Just go scroll down, and read, and don't forget to click the purple button at the bottom when you're done! Thank you, and enjoy!

* * *

"_I could a tale unfold whose lightest words_

_Would harrow up thy soul, freeze thy young blood,_

_Make thy two eyes, like stars, start from their spheres."-_Shakespeare, Hamlet

* * *

Chapter Eight: Bloody Teachings Lacus' POV 

"Miss.Clyne, we shall reach our destination shortly," spoke Mr.Andrea, my driver. I nodded briefly, before shutting off the communication. I let out a long sigh and slumped back against the seat of my limo. I had failed, but that's no surprise…failure is what I am, it's my destiny to fail. Every song I write, is merely an illusion, every word I speak, the 'words of wisdom' are just fancy words, which I can't put a meaning behind. It's all an illusion, Lacus Clyne is a nobody, a failure. Memories from time gone past suddenly resurface, memories of my childhood, memories of my mother, horrible memories that had been banished for so long, they came back to me now.

The tears started the streak down my face, and with a long rumble of thunder, the sky was crying with me. The rain was falling, it was falling endlessly, soaking the earth, and giving new life to the flowers and the trees. But all I could do was continue to cry, to sob hysterically. I had failed someone else…

"I'm so sorry, Kira-sama…"

Then I'm trembling, shaking uncontrollably. I'm nothing…I'm a nobody! I'm not the 'perfect' idol everybody loves. I'm just a girl that hides behind a mask. Their love for me is an illusion, Lacus Clyne, the perfect pink haired princess, princess of pop, is a petty liar, she's a girl who is selfish, who never can say what she is really feeling, a girl who fails the ones dearest to her.

"Stop the car!" I shout. Mr.Andrea, hearing my scream screeches to a stop, and I run out into the forest, far into the unseen depths. I fall to the ground and cry my heart out for what seems like hours.

Several minutes later, the sun comes out, and the sun spreads throughout the land, the squirrels and birds come out to rejoice, and suddenly, I smile, and wipe away my tears. The rainfall has just bloomed a flower, a beautiful flower.

I get up with my hope renewed, because there is still hope, no matter what. There is still something I can do…

I pick up my phone and call _her._

* * *

Cagalli's POV 

Aaargh! Why did this stupid shuttle have to break down? While I'm in the middle of NOWHERE? Is this my fate? To die in a broken shuttle? Why does life have to be so mean? How am I going to survive without getting more food? Okay, I have a months supply here…but that's not the point! If this stupid thing doesn't work, I'm going to be here, abandoned…all alone, for the rest of my freaking life! Okay, Cagalli, just calm down, I suppose you could try and fix this, your pretty good with machines. Yes, that's a girl, just check the engine, and get this STUPID thing to work, and stop taking your freaking anger out on your readers!

Oops…the readers. I gulp quickly. I'm so sorry for the inconvenience! You see, I was flying through space, talking to you, when the shuttle engine fails. So now, I'm stuck here, as you can see.

Now, lets see, how to fix this thing…I get closer to the control panel and sigh deeply, hunching over in exhaustion. I don't want to be dealing with this, I want to go to sleep…but I want to find that boy, my savior. My anger begins to spark, as I pound the control panel with my fists.

"Damnit!" I cried. Suddenly a red light caught my attention.

"Shuttle will self-destruct in…" the numbers in the screen started to scroll down, lower and lower…

_uh oh_

* * *

Haru's POV 

The expanse before me is endless, with no limitations, no end. The stars shine continuously, glimmering, like hope in the direst situation. I let out a contented sigh, I'm happy right now, to be staring into the vastness of space. I smile slightly. Being in outer space has its perks. But the moment couldn't last, I had to pay the person I was here for a visit.

I quickly walked into the infirmary, to see Kira-sama absorbed in the newspaper. I smiled in spite of myself.

"Hello, Yamato-sama," I greet him formally. His head turns in my direction, and he looks startled.

"My name is Haru Hotaru, it's a pleasure to meet you," I said floating over to him and extending my hand.

"The pleasures mine," he said, shaking my hand. He looked confused.

"I was curious to see you, Yamato-sama, my home, too, was in Orb, and I've heard so much about you…please, Yamato-sama, may I ask you a few questions?" I explained, seating myself on the stool beside his bed. He looked straight into my eyes, the calm amethyst looking past me, and into my soul. He seemed to study me forever, before an answer came.

"Yes, Haru-sama, you may. But please, just call me Kira." I averted his eyes, staring at the flowers on his bedside table.

I smiled at him and nodded. "But you must not tell anyone I came, understand? I will not tell any of your answers to any of my fellow soldiers." I sighed, deeply. He raises an eyebrow, but nods.

I clear my throat before I start.

"Kira-sama, you were born in Carpentaria, am I correct?" I questioned. He nodded.

"Then you moved to Heliopoless, to escape this war," I continued.

He nodded again.

"But after Helipoless' demise, you were caught in the middle of the war you tried to hard to escape. How did that feel?" I looked at him searchingly.

"I…I felt frightened, and angered. I spent most of my nights crying, and whenever I fought, I lost all my mercy. I was hurt, I was pained, and the rain that fell just wouldn't stop. But I had to do it, I had to protect."

I looked at him respectfully. I understood the concept, to not want to do something, no, to be against doing something, being frightened of doing it…but having the weight on ones shoulders and the pressure, and the price…that you face your fears and do it.

"Kira-sama, do you think in this war, can peace be obtained? Even when we have our own beliefs and religions? Is peace only a dream, never to come true?" I looked at him seriously. I had never asked anyone this, but my mind kept on thinking about it, thinking and thinking. I just had to ask this soldier, this kind, innocent soldier, the one question that kept me up at night.

He smiled at me. He gave me a genuine smile. "Of course, it can. All the faults of humanity can be mended by humanity. If we give up hope, and say 'peace' can never be achieved', then it won't ever be achieved! But it won't come with only fighting…we'll have to talk, and compromise. War will lead to nothing, it's only an illusionary path to peace."

"I agree. So would you, Kira Yamato, do whatever it takes to obtain that peace?" I looked at him seriously, this was the big question. "_Anything it takes?_"

Kira arches an eyebrow. "Of course I would!" he exclaimed, as if it was obvious. "I'd give my life for it!"

I smiled at him. "Then, your fate is now sealed," I spoke softly. "I'm not supposed to tell you this, but I'm here as a spy. A spy to break you out of here when your fully recovered. Then, you can do whatever you want; return to the battlefield, or live in Orb in peace. It will be your call, as long as I know whatever you will do, will be for the better, not the worst."

Kira looked stunned. Then his body froze. And he smiled. His body started to tremble, then to shake. I jumped to my feet.

"Kira-sama! Are you alright? Should I call the doctor?" I asked, panicking.

"N-no…Haru-sama, please get Athrun!" I nodded firmly. He must have stressed himself too much. "Zala-sama will be here right away!" I turned and quickly walked out of the room, bumping into a slim, muscular body. I look up to see the face of none other then Yzak Joule. He sneered at me.

"What do you want, you filthy _traitor_?"

My blood ran cold, my heart froze. He'd _heard!_

* * *

Athrun's POV 

I walked out of my room to head to the cafeteria, and then to visit Kira. I had been busy with my duty, so I couldn't see him a lot, unfortunately.

"Zala-sama! Zala-sama!" I turn and hear the voice as the new female recruit runs in my direction. She seems pale, and nervous, as if experiencing one of those horrible life-changing moments.

"What is it?" I ask curiously.

"It's Kira-sama! I think something's wrong, he's been stressing himself, sitting up when he should be lying down, resting. And he's been talking too much, and worrying about things that are out of his control. But the point is, something's terribly wrong, he's only getting worse. He needs you, Zala-sama!" she stopped to take in a deep breath, but by then I was already sprinting towards the infirmary.

When I reach there, Kira's body is shaking, and he's crying. He looks terribly frail, and sick.

"Kira!" I kneel by his bed and pull him into my arms.

"A-Athrun, it hurts!" he wails, clutching my shirt tightly.

"Shh, Kira, it'll be alright, you're going to be just fine." I say rubbing his back, worriedly. He was scaring me, I was scared of losing him.

Suddenly, he passes out. I look down at his face, and put a hand on his chest. What's happening? Will Kira be alright. Tears start to form in my eyes, and I bury my face in Kira's hair, pressing my hand harder against Kira's chest.

Then I realize it with a horrible start. I started to panic, to tremble, and my tears started to pour down more constantly, as I called for help.

Kira had stopped breathing

* * *

Cagalli's POV 

Finally! I found the Life POD and sat down, ejecting it from the shuttle. Good thing, too, because not a second later did the shuttle self-destruct. I sighed, frustrated. I am destined to die alone in space, aren't I?

But there's nothing I can do, so I sit, and wait…

But I don't have to wait long before something happens; my cellphone rings. I pick it up, only to hear a voice I'd known, a couple of light years ago…

"Lacus?"

To be continued…

* * *

"_We but teach bloody instructions, which being taught,_

_return to plague the inventor."-_Shakespeare, Machbeth

* * *

**A/N: **Well, there you have it! Chapter eight 'bloody teachings', even though the title doesn't fit. Tee hee. And don't kill me for being so mean to Lacus-sama! Or for the suspense. This chapter wasn't rushed, I'd planned it this way! Anyway, this and the next chapter will be getting a side story very soon, just to tell you. I hoped you liked it, and the editing will soon be completed! 

Have a wonderful weekend!

Haru Hotaru


	9. Chapter 9: The Calm Before The Storm

Find the Way-Chapter Nine-Calm Before the Storm

**Disclaimer: **I may read chapter after chapter. I may fantasize about every character. But Mobile Suit Gundam SEED shall never be mine. All rights over the anime go to Bandai and Sunrise.

**A/N:** Minna-san konnichiwa! I'm so sorry for the long update, but I think this is quite fast, considering it's me we're talking about here. The truth is, nobody would update his or her stories, so I got bored. So, then I thought, 'why not update mine'. So here we are.

Expect more Japanese from me from now on, see, I've been taking Japanese classes, and I really want to practice what I've learnt. The class is awesome, so is our sensei, Louisa-sensei.

Well, the story must go on! Just read on below, and remember the click 'submit review' when you're done! I hope you will all enjoy this chapter! And please, everyone, update your stories really soon!

* * *

**Lacus' POV**

The sea of memories overflowed my mind, as I head Cagalli's voice for the first time in years. I felt the joy grow within me, excitement evident in my beaming eyes. "Cag-chan, it's me!" I exclaimed happily into the phone. I waited a few moments, before hearing a surprised gasp, and my name uttered in surprise. My smile grew wider.

"I know it's a little odd for me to call, and I am putting both of us in danger, but it's worth a try. I need your help, desperately. My friend, Kira, is in great peril. I have no time to explain…but I need you to somehow come to PLANT to see me." I say. When her reply comes, my eyes widen in surprise.

"What? You were in space already…you blew up your shuttle? Cagalli-chan, you're crazy, you know that, right?" I giggle slightly, hearing about her predicament. I listen to her ramble on about how the shuttle had broken down, and it wasn't her fault at all. I sigh, before interrupting her ranting.

"Cag-chan, at least you're alright, and that's all that matters. Don't worry, I'll have someone come and rescue you. You should really be more careful, who knows what we'd do if anything happened to you. Oh, and you can't tell anyone about my friend, otherwise you'll be killed. Until next time," I hung up abruptly, just to annoy her. The happiness swelled inside of me. I ran to my limo, but stopped dead when I saw a raven-haired man standing beside Andrea. My breath froze in my throat, and fear made my blood run cold.

"Dullindal-sama…"

* * *

**Mwu's POV**

"Murrue-san! Open up the door or I will personally shoot it down!" I yelled, pounding my fist against the locked door for the hundredth time. The captain had made her way to the room after yet another fight with Natarle-san, and hadn't come out for 5 hours straight. I was worried, although I didn't show it.

After waiting 10 more minutes, I lost my patience.

"OPEN UP NOW OR I'LL…GAHH!" I cried when the door finally slid open, but as I'd been leaning my full weight on the door, I fell to the floor with a resounding thud.

"Oww…" I mumbled, looking up. A blush quickly made it's way on my cheeks, I turned several shades redder then the ZAFT elite uniform.

Murrue was in her nightgown, which was a light summer-y blue. It had half-sleeves, and a low neck, showing her cleavage. The nightgown fell to just above her knees. When I had fell, she had backed away in surprise, but my head had landed in the middle of her legs. So when I looked up, I saw straight up, under her nightgown.

"uhmm…" I gulp, and we both jump up.

Murrue's hair was feral, jutting out in several directions. Her eyes were as wide as saucers, and a bright red blush lined her cheeks, mirroring mine. She was cute when she blushed.

"Hentai!" she cried slapping me hard on the cheek. I grimaced and rubbed it tenderly.

"What was that for?" I yelped, backing into the wall, shaking in fright.

"For being a hentai!" she screeched.

"Hey, that wasn't my fault! I fell! And I did that only because you wouldn't open the damned door, I've been pounding the door for what? An hour?" I snapped, still blushing profusely.

"You were?" she asks arching her eyebrow, shooting me a questioning look.

"Hell yeah! Why didn't you open to door?" I ask irritably.

"I'm sorry, Mwu-kun, I fell asleep, and well…" she averted her eyes.

"What!?!? You were ASLEEP while I was worrying my head off that you were depressed, or stressed, or sick??? You were sleeping!?!?" I exploded, shaking my fist at her.

"Oh! Mwu-kun, you were worried about me? I'm so sorry…" she looked at me with puppy-dog-eyes.

"I-it's okay, Murrue…" We stared into each other's eyes in silence. Before I scratched my head. "Uh, Murrue-san, why are we acting like those good-for-nothing-teenagers?"

Silence followed my statement, until we both burst into fits of laughter. A few minutes later, we calmed ourselves, and she sat down on her bed, motioning for me to follow suit.

I obediently sat down by her side, staring down at the floor. A few more minutes of silence slowly flew by, but it wasn't uncomfortable, It's just right, being by her side, surrounded by the darkness.

"So, Mwu-kun, what do you think we should do? We can't leave Kira-kun there all by himself…I was so certain before, but now, I'm just clueless…" she mutters, looking at me seriously. I sigh, bringing up my gaze to meet hers.

"I don't know either, Le Crueset will be able to destroy us in an instant, without the Strike there to protect us. I might be the man who can make the impossible possible, but the kids the miracle worker. He's amazing, even for a coordinator. We're sitting ducks without him, emotionally, too. And that damned commander will be able to sense me too…" I say angrily.

Murrue looks at me questioningly. "Sense…?"

I nod and look away.

"Yes, I can sense him, and he can sense me. I don't know why though." I explain calmly.

"I see," she looks down at her feet. "Mwu-kun…I really screwed up, didn't I…?" her voice seemed distant, and her eyes filled with tears.

"Murrue-san…"

"I did! I was the one who pushed him into the Strike…I was the one who convinced him to pilot it…It's all my fault, right?" She starts to tremble.

"Murrue-san, it was all our faults…mine too. I was the one who dragged him into the world of warfare, thaught him all the horrifying rules. It was all our faults, but regardless; the kid chose to fight alongside us, to protect us, now, we must find a way to protect him in return." I brush her hair from her face, and stare into the depths of her eyes.

"Mwu-kun…I believe we'll find the way." She laces her hands around my neck, and looks up to me with all the affection the world could have etched on her smile. Then, our lips meet in a passionate kiss.

* * *

**Dullindal's POV**

She stood there, frozen. A smirk crosses my lips, amused.

"Clyne-san, it's been a long time, hasn't it?" I ask slyly.

"Y-yes Dullindal-sama! I've missed you. But what brings you here?" She replied automatically, a hint of bitterness laced in her voice.

"I was just driving by, when I saw your limo parked here. Are you alright?" I step closer to her, and she tenses.

"Yes, I was just going for a walk in the woods, to lighten up the mood." She explains quickly.

"In the pouring rain?" I question skeptically, her glamorous dress is soaked, her normally perfect hair is tangled and in knots, making look like a poor, uneducated women. But her periwinkle eyes still shone with dignity, and her stance was graceful, giving her the refined, courteous look she always had.

"Oh, yes, you see, I didn't expect it to start raining so suddenly…so I got drenched, as you can see." She flashed me the quickest excuse that crossed her mind.

"The weather channel has absolutely to role in this, I presume?" I say, tossing back my long hair. I laugh at her shocked expression. "I was joking, dear, why don't we go for another walk, now that it's not raining."

She hesitates, but takes my offer. We walk along the close-by river, side by side, surrounded by silence. When we reach a secluded area, a place concealed with trees, I grab her by her dawn-tinted hair and drag her in.

"Little bitch!" I hiss to her, tugging her hair. "You gave a speech at the council for his favor? You miserable, miserable girl! Don't ever talk to him again, or her, understand? Otherwise I will be forced to kill you. If Murata-sama finds out about this…just do what your supposed to do, nothing else. One more failure, and I won't hesitate to drive my pocketknife into your small neck."

She nods feebly, and I smile down sadly at her.

"I'm sorry, princess…but you know I had to do this. The world is putting a lot of pressure on us, the 'corrupt'. I'm really sorry, itoshii…" I stare down at the floor.

She stares up at me, with understanding eyes. Slowly, she wraps her arms around me, in a light embrace. I pull her closer, and heave a large sigh.

"I'm also sorry I must oppose you like this, ojii-san," she mumbles, calling me a name from far back.

"It's okay, Lacus-chan. You'll just see."

* * *

**Miriallia's POV**

I lay down to sleep, exhausted. Needless to say, life in the military was seriously nerve-wracking. But I guess I'm better off then others like Kira-kun. Kira-kun…I wonder how he's doing right now? I hope their treating him well.

Here on the Archangel, everything's changed. Captain Ramius keeps to herself, if she's not fighting with her second-in-command. Commander La Fllaga has stopped cracking jokes at just about anything. Fllay-san has been in her room when she's not doing the odd jobs around the Archangel. Sai-kun…he's just been keeping himself busy, but I'm still worried. Tolle-chan has abandoned his clumsiness, and although he tries to crack one of his normal jokes now and then, their not like the ones he used to tell, and he's beside himself with worry for his best friend. Kuzzey-kun is the same as always, but his eyes looked a little troubled.

As for me…I don't know how I am. I miss Kira-kun so much…but I want to keep up a level of normalcy right now.

I sigh, turning to my side, clamping my eyes shut, falling into a restless sleep.

* * *

**At the Supreme Council**

The Senators filed into the hall, and promptly took their seats. Many turned to whisper amongst themselves on the upcoming meeting. All mumbling ceased however when a tall man with graying hair walked in. The man was balding slightly, and his eyes were a pale gray (A/N: Is that wrong? I don't know his eye color, so can anyone please tell me?), his face aged and wrinkled. His body was uptight, and his expression was usually stern; but whenever he gave one of his rare smiles, they lifted the spirit of those around him, and the kind gentle look in his eyes were engraved into ever heart of his friends and family, even though that side of him was very rarely seen.

Patrick Zala cleared his throat, and swept a glance of the hall, before speaking. His voice was gruff and serious.

"The meeting may commence." He seated himself beside Siegal Clyne, and nodded. Abruptly, the council broke out into an argument, much was to be discussed; the EA had yet again sent another 'outrageous' proposal for peace. There had begun to be an increase in the number of the terrorist attacks, terrorizing the PLANT nation internally. The Blue Cosmo's were up to no good, slowly increasing their attacks on ZAFT bases in earth. Not to mention the captured pilot. Gilbert Dullindal had also wished to speak with them on some issue.

The council immediately rejected the proposal; how could the earth forces even think to speak to them like they were children? Their foolish taunts could not get anywhere. They decided the only thing they could do about the terrorist attacks was to strengthen the protection. For the Blue Cosmo's, they couldn't do much yet. For the captured pilot, it wasn't centered as much on the boy, but on the attention he was getting. News about him was going to spread soon, no doubt. Now the Lacus had made her speech just yesterday. But no matter; they could cover up what Lacus was saying with excuses like 'He was being manipulated'. At this turn in the discussion, Senator Clyne (A/N: Yes, only a Senator, how do I explain this? Siegal was chairman just until Patrick won the election 2 days ago, although not mentioned in the plot, since I found the election irrelevant until now, and later. I know that normally they wouldn't go to business so soon, but there was this terrorist attack, so they met then, and Lacus walked in after the discussion was over. Get it? I know this is a major flaw here, but oh well. And I know he left after, but I needed him, so he now plays the role Patrick used to play before.) was rather uneasy, and many were concerned. This was his daughter they were talking about, but it had to be done. After the had formed that conclusion, they paused. Silence fell upon the room, and a minute passed by before Chairman Zala ordered the guards to get Gilbert Dullindal in.

The man walked quickly into the room gracefully, and confidently. He faced the council and smiled.

"State your presence," said Chairman Zala indifferently.

"Ah, yes, Chairman. I am here to discuss with you an important issue, none other then what we call the 'legged' ship." Dullindal said smoothly.

The council turned to face him, faces bewildered.

"That 'issue' is being dealt with by Le Creusets commando team." Said Senator Jule. She had platinum blond hair matching her sons. Her eyes were a clear blue, like the deep waters of the ocean. Her faces was stern, but she had hidden beauty, and her eyes were affectionate.

"Yes, but that team seems to be having trouble. We have to finish the 'legged' ship right now, otherwise we shall hang our heads in shame when they and the Earth Forces reign victorious over us, and killing our hopes and dreams for fulfillment a freedom, our scientific progress will be reduced to nothing. It is our manifest destiny for us to prevail, and the naturals to fail. Fail miserably, and perish in the seas of regret…the regret of ever opposing us, the coordinators!"

The council listened, intrigued. Senator Clyne stood up abruptly, wearing an outraged expression on his face that many had not yet seen before.

"You mean to wipe out the natural population completely? That will kill us all…our population is already decreasing steadily, we'll condemn ourselves if we do away with them! Besides, we want to gain freedom, not to kill the naturals."

"Ah, but how do you know that a child needs a womb to be created?" the raven-haired mans words left a silence in their wake. The members of the council looked stunned.

"Dullindal! We've tried that and it has failed! Hibiki's son was created, but was killed. You know that perfectly well…it's not worth another try, throwing away unborn lives." Spoke Senator Amalfi heatedly.

"I understand your concern, Senator," said Dullindal calmly. "But the project **did** succeed, and that's the point. The child is indeed dead, but if we search through Mendal, we can find Hibiki's records. Let's not give up hope, shall we? Now will you assist me and put an end to the Legged Ship once and for all?"

Everyone turned to look at Chairman, who thought for a moment, before giving his consent.

"Yes, Dullindal, we shall provide our assistance."

A smiled curved Dullindals lips, and he leaned forwards.

"Very well. Let Operation Angel Down commence."

* * *

**Blue Cosmo's and the Atlantic Federation meeting hall**

"Azreal-sama! What are you suggesting? We created that ship, even if they have a coordinator child, or used too, we cannot harm them, as in combat. They'll find their way to Alaska soon, and we will court martial them!" Exclaimed an elderly man in his 60s. His face was soft, aged with time. His short hair was gray. The man was muscular, and broad. His eyes were soft amber that always felt some emotion. Rarely anger. Rather, they radiated with all the happiness, love, care, sadness, pain, and protectiveness the world could hold. Many wondered why he had joined the militia, especially the Blue Cosmo's. Many would label him 'traitor' the second they looked into his amber orbs. But he was the most loyal member they had, so he had demonstrated. But his demeanor was still soft, and his arguments always spoke of justice. Indeed, this man was one strange case.

"Lieutenant Gandolf, they are bound to betray us at some point. In which case, it's better to betray them before they can betray us, am I correct?" Murata Azreal thumped his fingers on the desk as he spoke. The young man had blonde hair; his eyes were a cruel sapphire. Many looked into them and froze; it was as if his eyes were ice. They were filled with anger, but not hot anger, rather, this anger was chilling. It was an anger that caused its victim to freeze. To lose all emotion; all feeling. Just to freeze until he or she could move no more, and die because of the cold. Yes, Murata Azreal preferred to chill rather then burn. And right now, he wanted to freeze an angel.

Gandolf looked as if he were about to protest, but bit back his words. The rest of the council was silent, considering the proposal.

Finally, they consented. Murata smiled. So far, so good.

"Alright, Operation Satan will commence shortly."

* * *

**Athrun's POV**

The doctors rushed in the room, immediately shoving me out the door. I bit my lip in frustration, as I began to shake in worry. The doctor placed Kira back on the bed, connecting him to the heart machines. He still had a pulse, which was on the low side, but not too low. That's a good sign, right?

They quickly placed an oxygen mark over his mouth and nose, but it didn't do much good. They continued to work for countless moments, until the doctor shook her hair back, nodded to her companions, and exited the room.

She walked up to me slowly. Heaving a deep breath, I turned to face her.

"What's wrong with him?" I ask.

"We're not sure, he's started to breathe again, but we're keeping the mask on just in case. It seems there is more to his condition then we first thought. I'm sorry to say this, but we don't know if he'll make it. But in his situation, that wouldn't be so bad now would it? Please excuse me." She walked away. I exhaled deeply

'You will live, Kira…I'll protect you.' I thought. I walked back into his room and seated myself by his side. I sat still for eternity, hoping for the one last hope I had not to be destroyed.

_Kira…_

* * *

**Life Pod-Dream**

"_Isn't the sun pretty, Cag-chan?" asked a four year old girl brightly. Her rosy pink hair fell a little past her shoulders, the front whisps a little short. Her sapphire eyes resembled the sky so clearly, her best friend often wondered if she was an angel. The girl stood gracefully, even at her young age. She wore a blue dress that fell to her knees, and was attached to her shoulders by small straps.  
_

_"Yes, Lacy-chan, the sun is cute!" laughed the little girl standing beside 'Lacy-chan'. Unlike her best friend, she wore a pink shirt, and cream-coloured pants. Her blonde hair was short, it fell to her neck, in a boyish cut. She was already a tomboy. Her eyes were a dark amber, that to her best friend resembled many fields, or meadows, miles and miles of them. It was often said that her eyes spoke of many fields, all radiating with hope.  
_

"_Girls, lemonade!" called Mrs.Clyne. The two little girls gasped with delight and ran towards the table, jumping into seats. _

_Alice Clyne smiled down at both of the children.She, like her daughter had pink hair, which fell to her waist. Her eyes however, were a light brown.  
_

"_You're Uncle is visiting," she informed the girls happily. Both of them once again gasped in delight. Alice bit back a laugh. They loved their uncle. He really was good with children._

_As if on cue, the man walked out into the backyard. _

"_UNCLE DULLY!!!" both girls squealed, throwing themselves into his arms._

"_Well, well," he said, clearly amused. "Hey kiddos, you two have grown, it's been a long time."_

_Cag-chan nodded enthusiastically. "I've been longing to see you, Uncle Dully! Will you take us to the beach again?"_

_The raven-haired uncle laughed and lifted her into his arms. "Anything for you, itoshii."_

Cagalli stirred in her sleep. Sweat trickled down her face, and she inhaled fiercely.

"No…" she told herself. "I cannot allow myself to live in the past, when my futures in my hands…"

Yet the blonde could not banish the childhood memories, of a brighter time. She had been so naïve back then. So happy. So foolish. She had allowed her best friend to be ripped away from her, and by the man she idolized more then anything else.

She could not run away any longer, the past was catching up to her, no matter how fast she ran.

She knew that neither she or Lacus could escape the shadows now…even if they did, they'd have to contend with the skies of peril looming ahead. They were trapped, they were lost.

They were doomed.

* * *

**A/N: ** Here is chapter nine. I hope you are happy, I slaved over this for a month. A month! Editing, writing, re-writing. And I got serious writer's block. I'm proud of this chapter, I worked really hard on it. I know there are many questions, that I intended to answer now, but I'm tired of typing endlessly. I'll explain my twisted plot line later. For those of you who have seen my profile, you know what happens next chapter…or do you? It's going to take me a long time to type all that…it's going to be a very long chapter. And a plot twist. The story will really start in Chapter 10.

Please don't hesitate to ask questions or give feedback. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, again,

Minna-san sayoonara!


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